With her parents and Sookie leaving for the weekend, Janet makes up her mind that she and Diego will be together.

Thursday evening, they finished packing the car before dinner. The family ate a quick meal and left before dark. Janet called Diego when they were gone. He drove over, suddenly very nervous. He’d told his parents he was sleeping in Sookie’s room, but he was sure they knew the truth. He’d found a box of condoms in his overnight bag.

She met him at the door with a shy smile. Was she having second thoughts? He hoped not. Jeff Beck’s Blow by Blow played on the stereo. The intricate music of the jazz guitarist, was among his favorites.

“You hungry?” she asked when the door was shut and locked behind him.

“No. I ate at home. Are you sure about this, Janet?”

She pushed him against the door, kissing him with abandon. Any fear or worry he’d had, left him. Her spirited advances left no doubt in his mind that she was ready, and she was expecting him to fulfill his promises to her.

“Let’s go downstairs,” he said hoarsely.

She led him to her room. She’d lit candles on the metal shelves in one corner. Her double bed looked inviting.

Diego shut and locked the door, even though they were alone. He set down his bag and took her in his arms.

“You’re sure? Because you can still say no.”

“I don’t want to say no,” she protested. She started to take of her shirt, but he stopped her.

“Let me.” Diego reached for her shirt, slipping it over her head.

Janet took his off, her hands shaking. Chest to chest, they kissed a long time, their desire growing steadily.

For Diego, it was somewhat surreal. Something he’d waited for, dreamed about, was going to happen. He was going to make love to Janet. He wondered if he was dreaming. But even his best dream didn’t feel this good.

“You can still say no, Janet.” He nibbled her ear, his lips blazing a trail down her neck.

“Yes,” she whispered hoarsely.

They made love, slowly, gently, getting to know one another. Despite their ages, it didn’t seem dirty or wrong. It was as if their love making had fulfilled something that had been missing until then. This new relationship could be plucked away, all too soon. They were both determined to enjoy what they could. After making love a second time, they had a quick shower and got ready to sleep. Janet made sure to set the alarm.

“Get some sleep,” Diego told her. “School tomorrow, remember?”

“Yeah, yeah,” she mumbled as she fell asleep. “Be that way….”

“I love you, Janet.”

“I love you….”

“I don’t know if I can concentrate today,” Diego confided as they walked into school the next morning. “I’ll be thinking about you.”

“Me too. We have two more nights.”

“Today needs to pass by so we can go home and go to bed.”

Janet laughed, tossing her dark hair over her shoulder as he held the door for her. She was sure everyone could tell that their relationship had changed overnight, but she didn’t care. She knew she’d made the right decision. Diego walked her to class, running to his own before the bell. He was at the door again when class was over, scurrying to his next one once she was at her door. At lunch time, he was waiting by her locker.

“You forgot to pack your lunch.”

“Crap, I did.”

“It’s okay. I’ve got it covered.”

“What?”

“One advantage that high school has over junior high…. Open campus at lunch. Come on.”

©2020 Dellani Oakes

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Janet tells Diego about having to move to Texas, and about her deep, dark secret. He tells her it’s all right, and will all work out.

He opened his mouth, tilting her head back so hers fell open. The kiss he gave her was beyond anything he’d given her before. His tongue dove into her mouth over and over as he clutched her hair. He held her close, his chest crushed against hers. Slowly, he came back to himself and ended their heated embrace.

“I should take you home,” he said, his voice husky. “Your folks are worried.”

“Five more minutes,” she begged. “Hold me, kiss me just five more minutes.”

“We need to go, or I’m gonna do something bad.” He tugged at the crotch of his jeans.

Diego drove her home and walked her up to the house. Her parents waited anxiously in the living room. Sookie was in her room with the door shut.

Her mother rushed her, hugging her tight. “Thank God, oh, thank God!”

“I’m okay, Mom. I was at the park.” Janet’s voice was muffled by her mother’s shoulder.

“Let’s all sit down and calm down,” Evander said.

Diego and Janet sat together on the love seat. Her parents sat opposite on the couch. Evander leaned forward, hands folded in his lap.

“You ran off before I could finish,” he said quietly. “I know this is a shock. I know it’s not easy to process. Mom and I talked this over, and we’ve got a way to make this work. At least I hope so. School hasn’t started back home yet, so we could get Sookie in at the start of the year, if we left by the end of the week.”

Janet started to speak, but he held up his hand. She closed her mouth, letting him finish.

“Your Aunt Martha and Uncle Buck have agreed to let you stay with them. You and Maddie are the same age, and seem to get along well….”

“I love Maddie, she’s like my sister!”

“Then it’s perfect. You can stay with them. If you get tired of them, you can stay with Bunny’s family, or Diego’s.”

“You’d let me stay in the same house with him?” Janet was shocked.

“Not alone,” her mother said with a laugh. “But his parents agree that it would be okay, once in a while, for you to sleep over with Ramona like you’ve done for years.”

“Really? I wouldn’t have to leave?” She was so happy, she wanted to dance.

“We can do this for the school year,” her father said. “By summer, you’d need to move to Texas permanently.”

“Daddy? Really?” She burst into tears. “I don’t want to leave!”

“Honey, you two might not even be together by summertime. You could finish your high school in Lubbock. Maybe even get into college there. It’s a good school.”

“We’ll be together,” Janet argued. “We’ll love one another forever!”

“Honey, I know you think that….”

Janet didn’t say all the things in her mind. There were too many emotions battling for dominance.

“We’re going to start packing things up and set about getting this house on the market. We’re going this weekend to find a bigger place and get Sookie registered in school.”

“I’m not going. I have to work this weekend.”

“I thought it would be nice to do as a family….” her father began.

“I’ve got to keep my job. I can’t miss the entire weekend. That’s when we get the most business.”

Evander silently agreed with an inclination of his head. “We’re leaving Thursday night.”

“You can have a couple friends over to keep you company,” her mother said, sniffling. “I’d like you to come with us, but—I can understand why you won’t.”

“Can I go now?” Janet asked.

“Dad made a nice dinner….”

“I’m not hungry,” she said. “Can I go?”

“Sure,” her father said. “I’ll save you a plate.”

Janet nodded, rising. Diego followed without saying a word to her parents. Her mother burst into tears as the door closed. Janet heard her father speaking quietly and calmly. She couldn’t hear his words, just his hushed tone.

“Where do you want to go?” Diego asked.

“Taco Village. I’m starving,” she replied.

“But you just said….”

“I lied,” she snapped. “I can’t eat his food.”

Diego simply nodded and drove to his aunt’s restaurant.

©2020 Dellani Oakes

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While they are hiking, Evander tells Janet that Sookie is his daughter, too.

“So, where does that leave us?” Janet’s face held a challenge.

He shrugged, shaking his head. “Even if I can sell, what do I do here? That’s a big city, this is a small town.”

“Open another restaurant.”

“This town hasn’t got the pallet for my food. This is a meat and potatoes clientele. I do cordon bleu and soul food. Can you see these folks eating truffles—or chitlings?”

Janet laughed, picturing that. She shook her head.

“I know cooking, baby. I know food. I can’t get a decent job here.”

“So, we have to pick up and move now? Is that it? I have to leave all I know? Everyone I love? Is that what you’re saying?” She screeched. “Ramona was right! You want to take me away! You’re making me leave Diego!”

She screamed at him. People stared, but Janet didn’t care.

“Why did you have to come back now? You’ve f**ked it all up! Everything!” She pounded his chest. “I hate you! Take me home, I want to go home.”

Evander drove her home in silence. As soon as the car stopped, he tried talking to her, but she ran. At first, blindly, then with a purpose, she ran to the park, and sat on the swings, sobbing for several minutes.

Someone walked over and sat next to her. Janet didn’t look up, focusing on the ground. Her misery encompassed her as she rocked back and forth in the swing. He said nothing, but his presence made her calmer. They sat in silence a long time, swinging in unison.

“Your dad called me,” Diego said softly. “He said you’d run off. I told him I knew where you’d be.”

“Mind reader?”

He laughed softly. “No, baby. You go one of two places—here, or my house. You weren’t there….”

“He wants us to move.”

Diego nodded, taking her hand. He kissed her fingers.

“I want to be a family,” Janet wailed. “But I don’t want to leave.”

“Let him talk to you. Tell you more. You don’t know everything.”

“I know he’s Sookie’s father too. My parents lied about that. They lie about everything! Did he tell you why Mom left him?”

“No.”

She said nothing.

“Sometimes people lie to protect themselves, or they lie to protect people they love.”

“You don’t lie to me.”

“I would if the truth would hurt you this much. And you’d lie to me then, too.”

“I already have,” she whispered. “All my life is a lie. Everything I am—a big, fat, black lie.”

“What are you talking about, Janet?”

“The reason Mom left, the thing she couldn’t forgive—Dad’s half black. That makes me black too.”

“So? Is it a sin? Did you break a law? Your genetics don’t make you who you are to me. I don’t care what’s in your DNA, Janet.”

“It doesn’t upset you?” She looked up, dark brown eyes meeting his lighter ones. Gaping at him, she stifled a sob.

“Why would it? You’re beautiful, fun to be with, and I love you. I don’t care about anything else. So it doesn’t count as a lie.”

Janet burst into tears. Diego hopped off his swing, taking her in his arms. He pushed the swing back as he’d done before, standing between her legs. His kiss was tentative at first, gaining power as she responded. Breathless, they parted.

“I love you, Janet. I want to be with you, marry you…. I want to be the father of your children, and live with you forever.”

“I want that too.”

“We’ll get through this, I promise. Let’s hear what your dad has to say. I know we can find a solution.”

“Meantime, you’re thinking about what I said?”

He chuckled softly, seductively. “Baby, I haven’t stopped thinking about it, since you said you’d go out with me. I’m a guy, cut me some slack.”

“I think about it too. You make me tingle.”

“Cool….”

©2020 Dellani Oakes

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Sometimes, couples will have known one another for a while before taking it to a different level. For whatever reason, they don’t see that they’re in love. Several of my couples are good friends, often involved with other people. However, the bond between them is strong. Then suddenly, out of nowhere, completely by surprise, they realize that they’ve been in love for ages, and didn’t see it. I’ve decided to call these Epiphanies and I’ll be sharing them in and among the First Meetings.

Duff and Grace have been roommates and friends for over four years. Although Duff had carried a torch the entire time, Grace has kept him firmly locked away in the Friend Box. He keeps hoping something will change, that she’ll realize how much he loves her. He’s been waiting for the right time to talk to her, and finally one night, he has the chance. Her parents are visiting, and he’s talking to her father about what he wants to do once he graduates from college.

“Eventually, I want to do some teaching, but Grace comes first.”

I glanced at her. Tears welled in her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” I put my arms around her, holding her close.

“No man ever put me first,” she whispered. “Except you.”

“Gracie, you’re always first with me. No matter what.”

Nash and Emily quietly left the room. I held Grace, letting her cry. I just hold her until she’s done, I never tell her to stop. I learned a long time ago, that’s the way to make her angry, or make her cry longer.

“Why didn’t I ever see you?”

I didn’t answer, suspecting it was rhetorical.

“You’ve always been so good to me. You take care of me. I went from one moron to another, but you always stuck with me, comforting me when they left.”

“They weren’t all morons. Some of them were pretty nice.”

“Those guys didn’t get the part where we lived together.”

“Well, you have to admit, it’s not the most common arrangement.”

“True. They couldn’t believe we’d never been to bed together.”

“Men wouldn’t get that. There’s no straight man in the world who wants to be just friends with a woman. There’s always an agenda.”

“For what?” She turned wide eyes on me.

I shrugged as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Sex—duh. I shouldn’t even have to clarify that for you, Grace.”

“Was there for you? Have the last four years been part of an agenda?” She shoved away from me, sliding off the opposite side of the stool.

“Think for a second, how crazy that sounds.”

“You just said—”

“I love you, Grace. I’ve loved you for ages. I always hoped you’d eventually fall for me, too. I stayed on, as your friend, because it was the only piece of you I had. I could have left, but it would have killed me.”

“Seeing me with other men must have been torture,” she sighed, moving into the circle of my arms.

“Yeah.” I couldn’t say anymore. Just knowing there was another man sharing he bed, making love to her, made me sick. Many long nights, I’d lain awake listening to them having sex on the other side of the house. It was torture.

She kissed me deeply, pouring her love into it. Breathless, overwhelmed, I kissed her in return. It felt so good having her in my arms. This was where she was meant to be. There was only one place I wanted her more, but not with her parents in the house.

Her phone rang—that special ring tone. She reluctantly reached for it, but I took it from her.

“Hello?”

“Who’s this?”

“This is the roommate. Who the hell is this?”

“Mark. Her fucking boyfriend.”

I paused, considering. “Nope. You gave up that title when you left town without telling her. But that’s okay, because a better man is in your place. Thanks for that.”

“You? She’s dating you?”

“Yup! Just spent the most fantastic weekend of our lives. Lose the number, Dick.”

“Mark.”

“Whatever.” I hung up.

Grace stared at me, a smile twitching her lips. “You lie way too well.”

“It’s that theatre training. I simply elaborate on what I imagine us doing.” I shrugged like it was the most simple thing in the world.

Grace didn’t answer. She stepped closer, holding me tightly, her head pressed on my chest. “I love you so much, Duff. So very much.”

© 2020 Dellani Oakes

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Evander makes plans with Janet, after school. Once she gets home, he invites her to go for a ride.

They drove to the bluff south of town. It was one of Janet’s favorite places. They parked the car and headed to the hiking path. Her father handed her a hat and a canteen. Janet remembered they always used to hike together. Her father was adventurous, like she.

“Remember the rattlesnake?”

“I remember being scared white you’d get bit,” he replied. “That took courage, baby girl.”

“But I killed it.”

“And he was mighty tasty too.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell Mama?”

“About the snake?”

She gave him a patient look. Evander sighed heavily.

“There was never a good time. She was ecstatic about you. I was too. And I thought maybe—because there was so much white blood. It wouldn’t matter…. Your mother couldn’t forgive me.”

“She’s blamed me for years,” Janet snapped. “All my life, I’ve carried your guilt because you didn’t have the balls to tell her! Do you know what that’s done to us? Do you have any idea?” She wanted to hit him, but refrained.

“I tried apologizing. How does a man atone for a lie like that?”

“And it wasn’t because you were black. It was the lie! Five years we tried to live like a family and you finally gave up.”

“I did,” he admitted sadly. “I told her if she couldn’t forgive me, she could leave.”

“Why didn’t you leave?”

“Because it had to be her decision, not mine. I laid the line, she had to cross it or back away. It broke my heart when she chose to leave.”

“You never called. You didn’t write!”

“I did! I swear. Every birthday, every Christmas—I sent cards and gifts. They came back unopened. I tried to see you. I begged. The last ten years have been torture without my girls.”

“Where does Sookie fit into all this?”

“Sookie fits in like you.”

“What do you mean?”

“What Mom’s telling her right now, is that I’m her daddy, too.”

“What?” Janet was shocked, she stepped back, nearly going off the edge of the path.

Evander grabbed her, saving her from a long, drop down a steep hill. He held her to him, trembling. “Let’s head down,” he suggested.

Janet agreed. Suddenly tired, she leaned on him as the descended.

“We tried to put it back together like it was. I did my best to convince your mother…. The night she decided, it was a week after our anniversary. That was a good night. We were happy and I thought it would be better. A week later, she left me. She was pregnant, and we didn’t know.”

“What about Braden?”

“He was an old friend. They knew each other from her visits here. He let people think Sookie was his. He stepped in like a father, helping out. He’s a good man.”

“Why didn’t she marry him?” They were back at the car.

“We aren’t divorced. I love your mother, and I always hoped we’d get back together.”

“And now?”

“Now we are.”

“And what happens next? You can’t keep making that drive, spend a few days and go home.”

“That I can’t.”

“Can you get a job here?”

“I own a restaurant in Texas. I’m the chef. They can manage a few days with my sous chef.”

“But you have to go back?’

Evander nodded.

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Janet tells Ramona about her father arriving. Then, her friend puts a bug in her ear, asking if they will move back to Texas. She’s so upset, she’s late to class.

The bell rang for class. Mrs. Frost wrote her a note and she walked rapidly to the chorus room on the other side of the auditorium.

Diego watched the door anxiously and smiled when she walked in. She had no time to explain before class, but made sure to tell him after.

Ramona and Bunny rode home again with Betty, leaving them alone to talk.

“Where did that idea come from? Your dad?”

“Mona. She asked me this morning.”

He snorted derisively. “Until your folks say it, don’t sweat it.”

They drove to the A&W for a cold drink. Over root beer floats, they talked calmly about what to do if her parents moved.

“You’ve got family here. Stay with them. Or Bunny. Or us.”

“Mom would never let me stay with you.”

He grimaced, nodding. “True. But your aunt and uncle would probably let you stay.”

Diego drove Janet home, then hurried off to work. Janet walked into a house she hardly recognized. Her mother had rearranged the furniture and picked up the clutter.

Her mother’s door was closed. She didn’t go near it, knowing what she’d likely hear. Sookie wasn’t home. The phone rang, making her jump. She answered on the second ring.

“H-hello?”

“Hi, it’s me.” Ramona. “Sookie’s here and wants to stay with the twins. Is that cool?”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Mom and Dad are—busy….”

“Ooh, lucky you.”

“I’m going for a walk.”

“Meet me in the park.”

“On my way.”

As children, they often met in the park after school. It was equidistant between their houses and neutral ground where they could be themselves. They sat on the swings and Janet remembered being there with Diego. She smiled.

“Could it be any more weird?” Ramona asked.

“Not really. He’s like a stranger—but not. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry—what I said before. I didn’t know it would freak you out so bad. Diego told me. That whole mouth control issue….” She made her fingers look like mouths, opening and closing them as she spoke.

“If I have to, I’ll live with Aunt Martha. It wouldn’t be too bad. But would she let me stay three years?” Janet sniffled.

“Maybe not. But this year…. At least you’d have now. Diego graduates anyway, so this is the important year, Jan.”

The girls walked to the corner market and got sodas, drinking them as they walked to Ramona’s.

“Your mom called,” Carlos told her as they walked in. “I’ll drive you girls home. You might want to mention your visitor before hand.”

“Good idea. Sookie!” Janet called.

Her little sister came out, carrying a Barbie doll. “I hope this is important?” She sounded so disgusted and mature, Janet had to hide a laugh.

“We need to head home, squirt.”

“Must we? Okay.” Sookie groaned, rolling her eyes.

In the car, Janet explained who was visiting.

“Do I call him Dad, too?” Sookie asked angrily.

“Whatever he tells you to call him. I call your dad by his name. He’ll probably do that, too.”

“They scared me, you know,” she said solemnly.

“I know, squirt. You can sleep in with me, if you want.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, we’ll have a pajama party.”

“Cool!” Happier, Sookie jumped out of the car and ran up to the house.

©2020 Dellani Oakes

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