Out of nowhere, Tex shows up at her parents’ house on Christmas Day.
He stopped babbling, listening to her. His face clouded. “I’m so sorry, baby. I didn’t know.”
“Don’t call me baby. Don’t you ever call me baby! You gave up that right the second you raised your hand to me, and killed our child!”
Tex hung his head. He rubbed his nose, sniffling loudly. “I’m so sorry about that. I can’t take back what I did. That was the worst thing I’ve ever done…. I didn’t know. I couldn’t possibly.”
“Oh, so it’s okay to beat the hell out of me if I’m not pregnant?”
“No, babe. No. That was wrong, totally wrong. But I wasn’t in my right mind. You have to believe—to know, I couldn’t control myself. I was in deep, Janet. The drugs, the alcohol.”
“The women. Don’t be coy, I know you had more than one affair.”
“I wouldn’t call it that.”
“One night stands? Orgies? F**k parties?”
“Janet, can I came in?”
“Absolutely not. Anything you want to say, you can say from here.”
“I’m putting my life back together. I’m in a program. I’m drug and alcohol free, have been almost two years. I got about as low as a man can go. When I hit the bottom, I started looking for a way back up. They got me in AA and Narcotics Anonymous. I found out that I was working hard on a sex addiction.”
“They have programs for that too,” she replied tersely. “It’s called castration.”
“Don’t,” he whispered. “Throw me a bone, ba…. Janet. Please. I messed up bad. I know that. As part of my program, I’m supposed to find people I hurt, and make it right. I know I can’t make our child’s death right. But if you’ll take me back, give me another chance, I’d like to try again. This time, we can have the baby you want…. I’ve always wanted kids….”
“Why? Why is it so important?”
“I love you!”
“You beat me. You cheated on me repeatedly. You killed our son!”
“It was a boy?” His eyes clouded once more, and the tears fell. “I’m sorry. I’m so terribly sorry…. How can I fix this? How can I make this right?”
“I don’t think you can,” she said tersely. “I don’t think anything can put it right.”
“Will you give me another chance?”
She said nothing.
“You owe me a chance to reform.”
“I owe you nothing!” She screamed, forgetting about her mother and the neighbors.
“I need you,” he whispered. “I love you more than life and I need you to put it back together. I was my best when I was with you.”
“Your best sucks, Theodore.” She started to close the door.
Tex stopped it. “Please?”
Before she could stop him, he grabbed her, kissing her desperately. His hands roamed freely, with the knowledge of long, intimate association. Hating herself, she responded to his attentions. She couldn’t help it. She remembered how making love to him felt. No one, not even Diego, knew her body like Tex. He’d coaxed more from her than Diego ever had. Not that sex with him was bad, it wasn’t. But Tex did things Diego never imagined.
She shoved Tex away, gasping as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “I can’t. You need to go.”
“Please, Janet. Give me one last chance. If I blow it this time, I’ll give you the divorce. I’ll leave your life, and never come back. Please?”
©2020 Dellani Oakes
Dellani Oakes 